I got shot in the ass.

Actually, the arrow stuck me in the back of my thigh, but everyone prefers to say that I got shot in the ass.

The Trojans launched a major attack against us the other night.

After hearing the alarm, I rushed out to see the dark outline of about ten-thousand soldiers and a few hundred horsemen charging across the plain towards our camp.

This was Hector's revenge.

I immediately sent the order for our men to form a line, and ran to report to Odysseus. -I met the General halfway.

Odysseus was already on his horse and was riding with Achilles, Ajax and Diomedes towards the front of our camp.

I called to the General as he rode by, but he just gave me a nod and kept riding towards the Magnesian line.

By the time I got back to our Ithacans, Polites and Misenus were struggling to get the men into formation. It was frantic, and most of the men weren't fully armored. -I saw one guy with nothing but a spear and a helmet.

As our encampment was part of the front line, a stream of soldiers from other camps were pouring in and adding to the confusion.

After quickly grabbing my own sword and shield, I ran up next to Polites. -That's when the Trojans hit us.

They hit us hard.

More like a wave than a group of men, I watched the Trojans crash into our meager defense and sweep it backwards. After a few seconds, a wall of swords, shields, spears and men just swept over Polites and I.

I was immediately knocked off my feet and swept back several meters, but I wasn't hurt. Grabbing the nearest arm, I pulled myself up. When I nodded to thank the guy, I realized he was a Trojan.

He was as surprised as I was. -Maybe a bit moreso, because I ran him through before he could react.

That was the first Trojan I've struck since this war started.

Well, I guess I felt emboldened, because I then yelled something cheesy like: "Glory to Ithaca!" and charged forward into to fray.

That's when I got shot in the ass.

I've heard stories where men are seriously wounded in battle, only to discover it much later. I've been told the rush of battle can mask pain. -I didn't have that experience.

When I got shot, I felt it right away. Dropping like a rock, it was all I could do not to cry like a baby.

After that, I was pretty much a spectator. -However, I did finish one Trojan off who fell down next to me.

In retrospect, I was actually pretty fortunate, because soon after I fell, a group of our archers decided to set up around me. Teucer and Meriones were there. Those guys are amazing. -I would bet those two killed more than forty Trojans throughout the night.

At one point, I even saw Hector ride by. Well, he didn't actually ride by, -Teucer killed his horse. Hector was visibly pissed. Without missing a beat, he turned and started chopping through the crowd to get at Teucer. All the while, Teucer was shooting arrow after arrow at him.

Somehow, Hector managed to evade Teucer's barage. Maybe Teucer was too freaked out. In any case, before he could get close enough to our archers, Ajax and a group of his men swarmed Hector and his fellow Trojans.

In frustration, Hector picked up a rock and threw it at Teucer. It broke Teucer's hand.

Anyway, the battle lasted until dawn, at which time the Trojans made a fairly ordered retreat.

I can't really say that either side won. -Both of us lost a lot of men.

I spent yesterday in a medical tent. Instead of pulling the arrow out, the medic said it had to be pushed through. Mother of Zeus, I would rather have been shot again. I can hobble around a bit, but it still hurts like hell. -I am writing this lying on my stomach.

I haven't seen Odysseus, but Polites stopped by and told me the General had visited our camp. He just asked Polites a few questions about our casualties and then he disappeared.

Polites told Odysseus I was wounded, but I guess the General didn't feel it necessary to visit his first-in-command. -That guy is such a self-centered prick.

Ironically, I heard Achilles and Hector never met on the field of battle. Apparently they couldn't find one another.

I wonder if Hector will let things be. -I wish he would have just dropped by and asked for a duel.


Another pleasant day.

I can’t imagine why we still haven’t heard from the Trojans. I thought Hector would be quick to call on Achilles after the death of Lycaon.

The general consensus around camp is that Hector hasn’t shown up because he’s too afraid to fight Achilles. -I don’t buy that.

I think Hector’s ego wouldn't allow for such public cowardice. No, something else must be going on.

Agamemnon must think so too. -The guard is still doubled.

Anyway, I didn’t do very much today.

Earlier in the day I walked over to the build site and chatted with Misenus for a while. Now that the Horse is staring to take shape, it's going to be harder to keep it a secret. Just looking at it, it is pretty obvious the four pillars are the legs of something.

It didn’t really occur to me when we started to build it, but the whole strategy of this Horse could be ruined by a simple leak to the wrong person.

I am going to have to talk to Polites about this. -We need to take his bullshitting campaign more seriously.

After scamming a lunch off of Epieus and

Shit, the alarm just sounded. -More later.


Oddly enough, there was no sign of Hector or any other Trojans today.

Macar delivered Hermes' new helmet this morning, however. I have to admit, it looks fucking hilarious. I can’t even look at that goat without laughing.

I fastened the helmet onto Hermes and brought him over to Odysseus’ tent. When I arrived, the General was having lunch with Machaon and Podalirius, two brothers who are leading the Messenian army.

Odysseus thought Hermes’ helmet was fantastic. He even gave me a block of cheese to give to Macar. -I think the Messenian brothers were a bit confused.

Anyway, the General finally agreed to take the goat off my hands. Odysseus ordered a few soldiers to construct a small pen for Hermes next to his tent. He charged two of our men with the duty of seeing to it that Hermes was well cared for.

Later in the day I took a walk with Polites and a couple of our men south along the beach. These guys told Polites they had discovered a pretty good swimming hole.

The swimming hole was a basin hollowed out of a rocky ledge next to the water. The seawater flows into the basin from under the cliff, and it keeps the water inside constantly sloshing about.

It was a bit creepy jumping in at first, but once inside, the wave action made for a good time.

After a couple of hours, a few of our laundry women came by. None of them were particularly pretty, but we had a good time flirting with them nonetheless.

We spent the rest of the afternoon just swimming and chatting with these ladies. -I felt like I was fifteen years old again.


There was some fighting near Troy today.

Euryalus was there and he told Polites all about it. Euryalus called it a blood-bath.

Apparently, early this afternoon Achilles and Diomedes decided to head up to the village on Troy’s border to stir up some trouble. They took about thirty men with them.

As luck would have it, Achilles and his crew happened upon a group of Trojans who were trading with some of the villagers.

According to Euryalus, Achilles didn’t even bother to call a charge before he just rushed in.

Achilles caught the Trojans next to the small river that runs behind Troy.

Euryalus said before either side knew what was happening, Achilles had cut some Trojan sap clean in half.

He said Achilles was screaming stuff about Patroclus, but it didn’t really make any sense. Euryalus swears that Achilles said something like: “Patroclus was my horse father!” a bunch of times.

Anyway, all of our guys ran after Achilles. Some of the Trojans ran into the river, and some stayed to fight. He says that there were about fifty Trojans. About half of them fled when Achilles brought down the first guy.

When the rest of the Achaeans arrived, Achilles paused and Euryalus said there was a brief moment where both sides just stood looking at each other.

But then this Trojan guy named Lycaon dropped his sword, and walked up to Achilles. Euryalus said that Lycaon kneeled in front of Achilles and started to say something like: “Brave Achilles, why do you…”, but Achilles just casually cut his head off.

At that, all of the Trojans ran into the river.

I guess Achilles and everyone else jumped in after them.

Euryalus claims Achilles killed about ten guys, Diomedes killed two, and some guy named Canopus killed one.

Not one of our guys was hurt. However, Euryalus said Achilles almost drowned himself. I guess that Achilles isn’t a very strong swimmer, and some poor Trojan almost pulled Achilles down with him as Achilles was chopping him up.

There was the usual revelry about camp tonight.

I have to wonder what Agamemnon thinks of Achilles’ exploit this time around.

No doubt the Trojans are going to have an answer for this one. -Lycaon was Hector’s half-brother.


Odysseus sent word that he wanted a tour of the build site today.

I brought Hermes over to his tent and escorted them there.

When we arrived, Elpenor and Epieus were in the middle of a fight. Not a physical one, just a shouting match.

Right as we walked up, Elpenor screamed: “Well, maybe next time I get my tunic stitched, I’ll have lunch with the tailor. Hell, my sandals look a bit worn! Maybe the cobbler is free for dinner!”

I cleared my throat loudly.

Elpenor whirled around angrily, but upon seeing the General, he gasped and stammered something like: “Sir! Oh, General, welcome… You’re welcome. I mean, welcome to the build site! Oh, sorry Sir, my deepest apologies.”

Odysseus just nodded slowly and eyed Elpenor.

Epieus on the other hand, coolly walked up and greeted the General.

He bowed and said: “General Odysseus, it’s an honor to have you with us.”

Odysseus was much more pleased with Epieus’ greeting, and he asked if Epieus would show us around the site. -Epieus respectfully obliged.

Despite their apparent tiffs, Epieus and Elpenor have been doing a great job with the Wooden Horse project. The entire site is well organized, with all the excess materials neatly stacked about the perimeter.

Even their men looked sharp and purposeful, and they calmly but efficiently moved about.

Misenus told me that Elpenor and Epieus have been making lunch for their workers for some time now. Sometimes when they have extra, they treat Misenus and his guys too. -That would be enough to keep me happy.

The Horse looks great. The base and wheels have been attached, and the four pillars that will be its legs are almost complete. The legs aren’t actually just pillars either. They bend at the knees just like a horse. One of the front legs even comes forward a bit to suggest somewhat of a prance.

Odysseus was visibly impressed, and not just with the Horse.

It was obvious that he was very pleased with Epieus. Epieus had not only done first-rate work, but he also knew how to stroke the General’s ego.

As Epieus described the project, he managed a tone that implied that Odysseus, but likely no one else, could understand what he was talking about. -Epieus is a smart guy.

Anyway, Elpenor and Epieus made us lunch after the tour. -It was delicious.

After lunch, Odysseus pawned Hermes off on me once again. He asked if I could keep him until his winged helmet was done. For some reason, I agreed.

I’m a bit disappointed in myself.